Marriage experts advocate continuing to date your spouse after marriage and children. This is easier said than done... especially with four kids between the ages of two and ten! Although it's difficult, I am recently realizing just how important it is, and how lax I have been in continuing to cultivate my relationship with my wife.
Yesterday, I had Jen arrange to have her Mom come over, after church, to stay with the kids for the afternoon. I made sure the kids were fed, and put together a simple picnic lunch for the two of us. I took Jen to the gardens at a local metro park, where I think I had only taken her once before, when we were dating. It was nothing fancy, and we had no agenda, but we enjoyed the afternoon strolling the rose gardens and doing some streamside hiking... and Jen even found her first geocache.
The afternoon went way too fast, but it was the kind of days we used to have when our life was much simpler. It is sometimes hard to appreciate each other in the throes of daily stress and chaos that has characterized our life for the past years, but yesterday reminded me of one simple thing... I really enjoy my wife's company!
It had been so long since I had actually put time and effort into planning a "date" with my wife (instead of the typical "what do you want to do?", "I don't know, what do you want to do?"), that it felt a little like a first date all over again. (In fact, I'm hoping she'll go out with me again!)
I'm a protective Dad, and I'm not about to just dump my kids off at any opportunity, with just anyone who will keep them... I have way too much invested in them for that style of parenting. But, at the same time, I need to put more investment into my marriage. I need to arrange more opportunities, like yesterday, to slip away and just be a couple.. even if it is just a simple afternoon walk in the park. Thanks, Jen, for a great afternoon!
I have often considered myself to have an eye for photography... at least I used to think so. Anymore, it seems my mind is so cluttered with other things, that I don't slow down enough to notice as much as I used to. The opposite has happened with Jen, however. She never used to have an interest in photography, but since getting our digital camera, she has developed that interest, and most of our nicest recent pictures have been a result of her sharp eye. She could probably have spent several more hours walking these gardens looking for photographic opportunities, but (except for the obvious few I took with her in them) here are a few of her pics:
1 comment:
Catching up from being WAY behind...
What a beautiful sentiment. I am certain your wife TRULY appreciates you and what you do for her (every day and not just the "date nights")
Yet, don't underestimate the value of that one on one time with her too.
I am in the process of planing for our anniversary later this summer. We have had WAY TO MANY years of the same "what do you want to do - I dunno - what do YOU want to do" (then, not really doing anything special) approach for planning our anniversary.
Not this year! I am saving money and making plans! Not HUGE plans, but plans...
Also - that park is BEAUTIFUL, and your wife takes some very inspiring photos!!
Best to you and yours.
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