what you are

"You can only make what you are", said the twenty-something missionary-to-be this morning, as she addressed the congregation about her upcoming two year assignment in Central Asia.  It was more of an offhand comment, not the main point of her talk.  In fact, if you ask her what she spoke about this morning, this quote may not even come up.

But, I heard it... and I didn't hear much after that.

You see, I had spent the morning being very frustrated with one of my four children, who shall remain nameless.  It is not new frustration.  In fact, it is recurring and I am not sure how to address and deal with it.

Not for lack of trying, though.  No... I'm trying to push and mold and make the behaviour into something better... something good and acceptable.

And, the words of this fresh young face in the pulpit, who is single and childless and had no idea she was addressing my parenting, stopped me in my tracks. 

Make.

I'm trying to make this child into something that is acceptable... but, what am I?  After all, I can only make what I am... wow!

I had to stop and really ponder that this afternoon.  Am I even qualified to try to mold this child's behaviour?  Am I the example this child needs to see?  Am I exhibiting and living the behaviour I am trying to get from this child?

Ouch!  If I'm honest, I have to admit some shortcomings...

I still need to address the behavior, but perhaps I need to put some of the energy I am expending outward and turn it inward.  Perhaps I need to work on what I am a little more, so I am better qualified to work on this child's behaviour.  Man, this parenting stuff is hard... can I get an "amen"?

To the twenty-something fresh-faced missionary to Central Asia:  Thank you for the parenting lesson!  I know you had no idea you spoke about parenting, but I found a valuable lesson in your words... make sure I am what I want my kids to be!